Many Bothans Died to Bring You This Post…

So, obviously yesterday was the fourth day in May (it may still be the 4th where you are, or if you are reading this exactly 364 days after i publish it it could be 4th of May, again..) and that is apparently an important day to Star Wars fans, no idea why, i mean its just May the fourth… oh, wait. i get it, it sounds like “May the Force…”  clever, you guys.
Anyway i was going to try to do a piece for the 4th, but you know “Do… or do not. There is no try.”

i’m a massive Star Wars fan, and i want to make sure everyone knows my allegiance is to the side of the Light, however i am a realist and i try to be as honest as i can so i’m going to give it to you straight; if we were in the Star Wars universe and i had force powers i would almost certainly, instantly be seduced by the Dark Side.
I don’t see this as a character flaw, i’m not a bad guy, i’m just really good at being seduced… plus, the Dark Side has lightning that you can shoot from your fingers which is cool, search your feelings, you know it to be true…

Yesterday being the 4th, it follows that today is the 5th, as in Revenge of the 5th.

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You are part of the rebel alliance, and a traitor…

So, today get in the spirit and force choke a subordinate, impose some trade blockades, or just wipe out that rebel scum.

Okay, post is done so the odds of me quoting any more Star Wars is approximately 3,720 to 1…

Vintage Style Comic Covers

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So, a while back i was asked to put together a vintage looking poster. The idea i was given to work with was not entirely my taste, but making a couple vintage style comic covers was on my list of things to do for the blog… so i found a few old ideas i had written out, and threw together some covers for them. Okay. Let’s do this.


 Harnessing Resources in the Name of the Empire.

Journal of Wilbur Archibald MacTavish, Sunday September 5, 1875. “The cad of a beast lead us a jolly chase, eight days in all, and when we finally brought it down it took three of us just to lift one of the arms. Cavendish, upon seeing the great size and grotesque features of the thing mourned the loss of our camera-operator days earlier. Once we returned to our camp with our prize there was much commotion, none amongst those we had chosen to civilise had expected our return, and even less expected us to return with the framework of their former chieftain.
Shrewsbury has assured me he can fashion a great number of boots and belts from the fallen.”

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Pioneer Tales:  Pacifying Mercury. Issue 05

Mercury. First planet in our solar system orbiting the sun, its surface covered by thick swirling clouds, and beneath which, unknown until now, forests with canopies so dense they can block out massive amounts of the heat and sunlight that comes with being so close to the sun. These dark forests are what drew the MacTavish Corporation to Mercury, in the name of securing whatever bountiful treasures and natural resources hidden therein.

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 Cthulhu Cracks the Case.

“Innsmouth has always been an unnerving place, even before things got dark here. There has always been a shadow over the town. It is an unmistakeable, unbalanced feeling like a slow, creeping sense of dread that rolls into your mind’s peripheral vision; like heavy fog coming in off the sea. And, historically the sea is the source of the town’s problems, the fishermen going out and coming back in month after month with empty nets, the town going hungry and falling to ruin, that’s where the darkness came from the first time. And now a new darkness has fallen over Innsmouth, it didn’t take long, a few generations but like the tides this evil has an ebb and flow. It has been out for a long time, and now the tide is coming back in, overflowing with a brand new kind of peril for the town. The sea is waiting to be placated; it is where these new horrors spring from, where the town’s problems originally arose from, it is where I came from…”

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Innsmouth Murder Mysteries. Issue 12

A peril has risen around the town of Innsmouth, a town not unfamiliar with evil, but this is a new kind of evil and it will take a vast amount of power to defeat it. Luckily, the townsfolk have among them a saviour, Detective Algernon (Al) Cthulhu, once an unyielding force of dread, draining the sanity of the people of Innsmouth, now a welcome member of the town’s police force. There are few things in this world that can stand in the face of an Elder God, whatever this new threat is will learn that the hard way. Part pulp detective story, part paranormal archaeological treatise, part occult comedy this –much like the strange hybrid fishmen who call Innsmouth home- is a weird amalgam of things best not described at all, for to describe it is to invite peril into your psyche, the dark magics necessary to properly evoke the sense of precisely what this book is will see your lineage driven mad even unto the grinding painful unravelling of your descendants, generations from now.

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Space Adventurers, Adventuring in Space!

“If it was the last planet left whole in the entire universe, all the habitable moons turned to dust and every world broken apart, all of space turned into a cosmic wasteland, even if it was the only planet where anything still lived and everything still worked, even then I would rather die than step foot on Bohemia. Unfortunately the universe hasn’t come to an end, which is why we find ourselves on this cesspit, because every world – every THING – will end if we don’t stop it, and to do that I had to bring you to Bohemia, I had to show you the creature that destroyed your planet…”
“That is why we are here, Titus, son of the rat catcher.”

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Titus: Ratcatcher. Issue 01

M’nepheth, the Golden King of the planet Bohemia holds the once free and peaceful world in thrall; all are subjugated to his will. Then without warning two strangers land on the planet; one a Loshian, a powerful sorceress with hair of pure light and an outstanding warrior, and the other a green skinned adopted son of a rat catcher she found half a galaxy away. The Godking does not like interlopers who seek to upset his regime, and He likes even less when witches bring to his world the one who could end His reign; the green skinned stranger, the prophesied last survivor of Ma’aar.

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… and if you behave yourselves i might even throw together a tutorial on how i made these vintage style comic covers.
(actually i’m putting one together anyway, so, just carry on as you would, i suppose…)

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